Boswell Birth Story

Just a handful of days ago, you were still in my tummy and we didn't know who you were! Now that you're on the other side, we are so thankful to have you here, Boswell Philip.

You, like your brother, were what we thought a stubborn babe because you stayed head up from about 28 weeks on. Seriously, you NEVER flipped. Towards the end of pregnancy your head was mostly on my left side and would rotate to the right like you were trying, but you never quite made it (spoiler alert: there was a reason why!). Before we knew you were breech, I had planned to try for a VBAC. Really my heart's desire was to go into labor and experience it, even if I ended up in a C-Section again. So I went to the chiropractor, did Spinning Babies exercises, never reclined in a chair, crawled around on my hands and knees -- ALL the things to prevent another breech baby. Doctors and midwives told me it is rare to have 2 breech babies without a physical reason with me or babe. I had kept saying "I'll just make it as far as I can before asking for an epidural" because I knew the more interventions introduced, the higher chance of surgery. I didn't want to take my chances. After I  listened to several birth stories, read Ina May's book, and took a labor class online, your daddy gave me the courage to try all natural. He told me he believed in me and that was the one thing I needed to hear to give me confidence. 

I trained by exercising, eating healthy, listening to more stories on the Birth Hour podcast, and mentally preparing for a different birth experience. So, when you continued to stay breech despite all our efforts (there were some ridiculous things and stretches we tried, and a lot of them daddy had to help with!), I was devastated. Right about this time our world went into a lockdown as a virus (Coronavirus or "COVID19") spread. All of a sudden, we couldn't leave our house for any reason other than walks and groceries, and we couldn't visit with family. Having a toddler and being in my third trimester just made those realities more difficult for us. The unknowns of the virus and how long we'd be in quarantine, mixed with the disappointment of a breech babe, caused a lot of mental stress for us. There were a lot of scares with the virus: could our family visit us in the hospital? No. Could your daddy come with me to appointments and ultrasounds? No. Could he even come to the hospital for your birth? Unknown since we were still about 7 weeks out at the time. It was emotionally overwhelming and a lot we had to work through. A lot of tears, which your big brother Jericho did NOT like.

("Mama sad? Mama happy!!" Then he would begin to cry).

A few weeks before your delivery I was able to make peace with the surgery and focus on what was ahead. Since I had been through it once there were things I was stressed about, but overall I was MUCH less anxious than when I had Jericho. My doctor had a lot to do with calming my anxieties both about the surgery and the virus. He was confident your daddy would get to join us for your birth, and that is ALL I truly needed. 

The 2 weeks leading up to May 19, your schedules arrival, moved s.o. s.l.o.w.l.y. And I was SO uncomfortable. Up until 37 weeks I felt amazing, but once I hit full-term I could not get comfortable! I had to first cut back on how much I was walking (~4 miles a day), then shortly thereafter completely stop due to some other physical pains the weight of you was causing. I had a lot of Braxton Hicks and eventually a few light contractions - I was grateful for the tiniest taste of labor, but also worried my doctor wouldn't be the one in the practice on call if I went into labor! 

I also was super emotional. I couldn't think about dropping Jericho off at my parents' (Mae Mae and Bish) house without bursting into tears. The finality of that last step was very emotional for me!

There were bright spots during that time, too - your aunties threw me a virtual baby sprinkle since no gatherings were allowed. Your daddy gave me countless foot rubs and back scratches. I enjoyed sweet time with Jericho, playing and talking and being silly.

Finally Monday, May 18 came! Not only was this the day before your arrival, but my and your daddy's 7 year wedding anniversary! I dawned my mask early that morning and headed to the hospital for blood work and final paperwork. Then the 3 of us spent the morning together (+ doing some final chores) before we took Jer to my parents house after nap. He was SO excited. I mean, it was the first time he had been anywhere other than our house or neighborhood in about 10 weeks!! I held it together until my parents hugged us goodbye. Then I cried in the car some more. Finally I was able to pull it together for some one on one time with your dad that evening. Tante Rox and Uncle David brought us takeout, and we did our normal Monday night thing of watching the Bachelor.

We both slept surprisingly well (your daddy may have taken some NyQuil to help!). Your C-Section was scheduled for 9:30, which meant we had until 7:30 to arrive at the hospital! We got ready, I had a few happy and nervous tears while putting on makeup and doing my hair (I did NOT have energy to do this with Jericho's birth, ha!). Then we loaded up and set off!

After checking in we were taken to a room in a different part of our hospital than before. Apparently they had restructured in the last 2 and a half years, so instead of the beautiful, zen labor and delivery room we got a small, cold feeling room in the C-section hall. Once again I burst into tears in front of the nurse and just couldn't get them to stop. I got my IV placed, and we were surprisingly busy talking with our nurse and a few others and 9:30 had almost arrived!! But then...we got news there was an emergency C-section who needed to take our spot. So we were told to wait until 10:30, maybe 11. It turned out being closer to 11:30, ha! I wouldn't have minded so much except I was SO HUNGRY. When the doctor came in to talk before heading back I asked him if the spinal would take away my hunger pains 😂. While we waited we called my parents to talk to Jericho and we even got to go for a walk through the halls. This calmed me a lot.

Finally, it was our time!! I took the shot of nasty medicine, got into my wheelchair, put my mask on, and we headed to the OR. Once again, after we arrived, I cried. While I was overall more nervous with Jericho's delivery, I think the adrenaline of the unknown kept me going. This time I was much more emotional both about meeting you and being terrified the spinal wouldn't work. I kissed your dad goodbye and headed in. 

I remembered a lot of what happened. I think I had the same surgery tech holding my hands during the spinal this time as I did last time. Something about her voice and scent (you have to get really up close and personal for a few minutes) was super familiar. To me the numbing injection is not so bad, and I can only feel the spinal from the warmth or coolness flowing through my body. And a jolt I had through my leg - I had forgotten about that.

I was quickly laid down and people scrambled all around. I don't like to think about what's going on, so anytime I could, I tried to catch the anesthesiologist's attention to talk. I think I grilled her about her son. Where does he live? How old is he? Does he have any kids? She was not as chatty as me, so I had to keep thinking of new questions to ask 😂

Once I knew they had begun I felt a lot better since the meds were obviously working. Your daddy came back and I was so ready to meet this babe! This time is such a blur. Voices behind the curtain, voices behind my head, simultaneously trying to talk but pay attention and describe how I'm feeling. Your daddy told me "The baby's almost here! The nurse is getting the blanket ready!" He told the anesthesiologist his weight guess (8lbs 10oz). I said I think baby is big and I would feel justified about complaining about all the pain I'm in if he or she is 9+ lbs. The anesthesiologist looked over the curtain and shook her head, indicating she thought baby would be smaller. "Maybe you'll prove me wrong!" she had said. I felt a lot of pressure this go around, which I was prepared for, and it was so weird. 

Seconds later and..."it's a boy!!!" My doctor dropped the blue curtain and brought you up to the clear curtain so I could see your sweet face. And the hair!! So much hair. 

It took FOREVER for them to bring you back to me. I kept trying to use my hand to scootch the curtain a little to see what was happening. Everything was good and you were crying, I was just very impatient! I heard you were a big baby but not the exact size, and I just wanted to know!! While you and daddy were with the nurses, my Doctor told me I HAVE A REASON IM HAVING BDEECH BABIES! I put that in all caps because all I wanted was a real reason, not the old "oh, their heads and bodies are just too big to flip." He told me I have a septum at the top of my uterus, and that throughout pregnancy it gets smaller which is why it wasn't detected on the ultrasounds. Unfortunately with a septum the 3 risks are: not being able to get pregnant, high chance of miscarriage, and breech babies. While conceiving you took longer than we wanted, I wouldn't place us in the category of struggling to get pregnant. We did miscarry a baby before you, but again, it was so early in the pregnancy that it could have been a lot worse. I am thankful that my body held onto you, breech or not! I was thankful to know I wasn't crazy or that I didn't do enough to flip you, you truly did not have the space due to that septum.

An eternity later they brought YOU to me. And I got the sweetest skin to skin cuddles. Your daddy filled me in on your stats, we talked about how we have TWO boys and how we can't buy breakable things for awhile.

Boswell Philip, named for two of your great grandfathers (Nonna's dad and Mae Mae's dad. We can't wait to tell you about both of them). 9lbs, 2oz, 20.5 inches long (although a few days later you measured 21 inches after your breech legs straightened a bit). 14.75 inches head. You were bigger than your brother in all the ways, and I thought he was big!

Describing who you were named for to the nurses and doctors was sweet, and we talked about how Bos Murphy was a champion boxer in New Zealand. Not long after "Eye of the Tiger" came on the doctor's speakers and he said your training begins now! Unfortunately for you I'm not letting you play any contact sports 😉 I did get pretty shaky and my teeth were chattering from right around when you came to the end of the surgery.

My goodness this is a long story! I'll try to keep the recovery part short.

They wheeled me back to a hallway with curtains to be monitored for the next 2 hours. Because of your size you had to get pricked every couple of hours to check your blood sugars. That was not fun for me to watch! You nursed for a bit on me and did lots of skin to skin. We got to see the placenta (and took a pic!) My gracious that thing is enormous. I was desperately hungry as meds wore off so I got to chomp on ice chips. This time was sweet and fairly fast, although we knew we had a very impatient family waiting from their homes ready to hop on Zoom and meet this baby! We were cruel and wouldn't tell them if you were a boy or a girl until we could video chat. They all were elated to 'meet' you.

All of our nurses were wonderful. One of our day nurses we got to have twice and she was just the person we needed to give us confidence in that we knew what to do. And one of our night nurses was pushy in all the right ways, helping me reposition in nursing to help my pain as well as swaddling Bos so tight he could not escape. Her name was Annie, the same name we would have used for a little girl, and she was experienced, confident, and took no nonsense from stubborn little Boswell.

It's amazing how quickly they got me to get up to walk after surgery. Thankfully this time I was in little to no pain! I've had my moments since but it has been nothing like what I remembered from Jer. I think some of that has to do with exercising and being overall healthier this pregnancy, not having visitors so we could rest as much as we could, as well as being able to eat so much sooner after the surgery. With Jericho I had to wait a full 24 hours, this time I had surgery at noon and was eating by 5pm! 

We took lots of walks, met with doctors and got all our checks done every couple of hours, and felt very busy. We watched the Office and Friends as your first two shows, and tried to sleep when we could. The first night I got 40-50 minutes in chunks (!). That was rough. The next night was much better and your sleep at home has been phenomenal! You love your Halo swaddle and your Halo bassinet, hallelujah!

With a Tuesday surgery we had been told we would go home Friday, but we got discharged early! We were the ones who ultimately got to decide, but when the whole team of doctors and nurses is saying to go home, we decided we would be more comfortable there anyways! We were stoked to see Jericho, we had been having a hard time not crying when watching his videos we were getting. 

Your meeting him was precious, documented on video. He loved your naked feet and tiny toes. The first couple of days he had a lot of mood swings and tantrums, but he was always so excited to see you and help with all the diaper changes! He also loves the sound of you crying, and when you're not he says "Baby might cry! I'm listening! Do you hear it?!" He loves your hair and kissing your back.

We are so in love with you, Boswell Philip. You are a special little boy. You love to lay on our chests and snuggle, nurse like crazy, and hold my hand with your little fingers. We're only one week and one day in, but we think we'll keep you ☺️